Hello, kindred spirit!
I’m so glad to be here with you today. It’s a beautiful day here in L.A. I had a wonderful, impactful VIP day with a client this morning and then took a long walk, and now I get to spend time connecting with you before going over to my best friend’s house for dinner. So it’s a pretty great day, I gotta say.
I’m feeling grateful and inspired. And I hope you leave today’s episode feeling the same way!
Today I’m disclosing the secret to business.
But as you know, this podcast is all about flipping the script on how we talk about business. So this secret to business isn’t just for everyone, this is specifically the secret to business for sensitive and creative small business owners.
The reason I became a business coach in the first place is because when I first went into business for myself (I used to do brand design) I was looking for support and saw that most of the mainstream coaching out there was for a few very specific personality types that were not me at all:⠀
“If you’re not motivated, you’re just not inspired enough!”⠀
“Crush it! Take massive action right now! Show up every day 24/7.”
Or those humble brags: “I did these 3 things and immediately made six figures.”
Have you seen some of the same rhetoric? It’s intimidating, right? No wonder we think that there’s no space for us in the business world.
As highly sensitive people and creatives, we just don’t motivate the same way they do and their intense systems didn’t work for us.
So my goal since then has been to create a space in the online business world that’s nurturing and real about what business is actually like. No hustle culture or humble brags.
And hence the podcast name It’s Not Business, It’s Personal.
So let’s do it. Let’s dive in to THE SECRET. Are you ready? This is something that I say in almost every call with every client. It’s something I have to remind myself about constantly too.
The secret to business for creative HSPs is...
Selling is serving.
Sales can be super intimidating. We can love what we do and talk about it so easily when there’s no pressure on it, but then all of a sudden we have to take someone’s credit card information and all of that goes out the window.
We go ulm um bleh ugh and then our words get all formal and weird and we say things like “I leverage advanced strategies for paint innovation and create bespoke artisanal products for maximum enjoyment.”
When we really could just say…. “I do custom paintings in this style for this price.”
We make it so complicated.
And then we get so concerned with sounding sales-y and being sales-y that we never sell.
Because we tend to center our businesses around things we love and feel passionate about, we sometimes have a hard time charging for our services. Or at least charging what we’re actually worth. To illustrate this a little more, here is a piece I wrote called...
by Tricia Chinnici
I'm so sorry if anyone told you
that charging money for
is just a sale.
What you've created is so worthy
and worthy of payment
but that's not the reason.
It's a piece of you
and deserves a piece in return
but that's also not the reason.
You don't charge for you.
You charge for them.
Because they will not
take the steps
use the product
make the change
Until they're ready.
Until they're invested.
Until they've invested.
You are not going to change
their life until
they decide to change their life.
Do you know what won't
change their life?
Free is everywhere.
Free is anywhere.
Free is anyone
and you are more than anyone.
So share it.
And charge for it.
And know that it's
so much more than a
I read that piece to a client recently in a coaching session and she started crying. For people like us, it’s not business, it’s personal. And that’s great. That’s great.
As sensitives, we are really in tune with the emotions of others, which means that we can connect with others a much, much deeper level. We can really speak to what our customers are going through, and that also really helps us build trust.
This a superpower when it comes to business.
When you’re feeling self conscious about talking about what you do, and charging for it, remember that selling is serving! This is all about building connection rather than getting attention.
Connection over attention.
Thank the ego part of your brain for trying to protect you and then ask it to step aside, and think about the people who truly need what you do. Who need to hear your message. Who need to experience your art. Who need services like yours to change their life.
What do they need right now and how can you connect with that in a way that also feels authentic to you?
You’re not "taking their money” by providing something that will make their life better.
Answer honestly: were you upset when you bought your iPhone? Did you think "f*** Apple for selling me this product" or did you think "I need those new features, Apple take my money!"⠀
Money is energy. When you buy something great, you're energized, right? Because spending money is actually a positive experience if it's for something we believe in!⠀
We don’t feel the same about a product or service that you get for free. Maybe there's an immediate rush, but that energy fades *quickly* because there's no confidence behind it.⠀
Selling is serving. You're not selling a product, you're serving energy, emotion, and transformation.⠀
You're giving others the opportunity to gain that energy, that knowing that they've invested in something really good for them.⠀
So this week I want to encourage you to shift the way you think about sales.
Your action item this week (remember I give you an action item with every episode so that it’s not just in theory, you’re actually putting this in practice, I’m a business coach first) is to:
Write a paragraph about what you do, from this new perspective of service.
Write about your business describing who you serve, how you serve them well, and how their life changes from working with you. Bonus points if you’re able to write it in *their* language instead of yours.
That’s it! One paragraph. Now you have a beautiful new description of your business that you can use anywhere you need it! Social media, sales calls, your website, the sky is the limit.
And remember: Selling will get easier and easier as you practice.
So I hope this gives you a lot to think about for the next few days until our next episode! Next week I’ll really be diving into my personal story and so I really hope you’ll listen in.
And if you missed episode 1, make sure and go back, I’ve gotten an amazing response about it so far and it is all about the concept of courage and making brave decisions and living a brave life.
I’d love to connect with you even more, so please find me on Instagram.
And if you loved this episode, it would mean so much to me if you wrote a review and shared about it! New podcasts get ranked higher with more listens and reviews, so if you are able to spare 3 minutes it would absolutely mean the world to me.
Have a beautiful week, my kindred spirit.